Wow.
Recently I finished Choosing to SEE by Mary Beth Chapman. It is an incredibly powerful book. Mary Beth isn't the most polished writer on the planet, but there's a reason this book was on the NY Times Bestseller list.
In case you don't know her story, let me summarize. Mary Beth is the wife of contemporary Christian music star Steven Curtis Chapman. She and Steven had three biological children before going on to adopt three daughters from China. In 2008, her five year old daughter Maria was accidentally struck by an SUV driven by the Chapman's teenage son. Maria died from her injuries that day.
Mary Beth's writing is honest and transparent. She shares openly about everything: her poor body image as a teenager, her struggle with depression, the challenge of being in the public eye because of her husband's fame, her ongoing battle with grief. And yet, even in her deepest, darkest moments, Mary Beth points her reader back to God.
She admits that more often than not, she finds herself longing for the return of Jesus Christ so that she can hold her sweet daughter in her arms once again...the hope of heaven.
But on those days that she feels on the verge of despair, when fear and doubt and anger and sadness threaten to swallow her whole...it is in those moments that she chooses to SEE how God is working. How He is making all things new. That joys and blessings surround her even in the midst of sorrow and grief. It is in those moments, she shares, that she chooses to believe what she knows to be Truth - truth about God, about life, about herself - even when her broken heart is telling her a different story.
She would be the first one to say that none of it is easy. If she had her way, her daughter would still be here. She and her family wouldn't be carrying this burden of sorrow and grief. But sadly, that's not the reality. And since that's the case, she's determined to SEE how God can be glorified in the midst of such tragedy.
It is a wonderfully inspiring story, especially for anyone who has experienced loss or suffering or pain. I will admit that some nights it was hard to close my eyes after reading, the description of the accident scene and the horrifying emotions that come with experiencing such a loss made me want to run into the other room, grab hold of my boy and never let him go. But Mary Beth's story is so encouraging that it is worth the read.
This sounds like another good one for me to read, although like you said it can be hard to read stories like this b/c they bring to light some of our worst nightmares. This has been on my mind a lot lately though, as a 6 year old boy was accidentally hit by a car at the fair up here a couple of weeks ago while riding his bike, and he did not survive. This family had also already lost one child as a baby back in 2004, and I find myself just overcome by sadness for them. To lose not one, but two children is unthinkable. And yet, the family has asked the community to also pray for the man who hit their son, as he is also going through his own suffering right now too. Amazing people. Please pray for them.
ReplyDeleteStill, as someone who struggles to trust or even BELIEVE in God after going through (admittedly lesser) struggles, reading a book by someone who is able to focus on just the opposite despite her grief would most certainly do me some good. I am in awe of the people of faith who are able to grow stronger, not weaker, in their beliefs as a result of tragedy, and often wish I somehow could muster that kind of faith myself.
I love your book reviews, by the way! You could make a career out of it. :)
I need an encouraging story right about now...I'll let you know if I end up reading it! My faith needs a band aid right now, maybe I need this....
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments, friends! I really encourage you to check out this book. I just re-read a large portion of it over the holiday weekend, and again was struck by Mary Beth's courage and faith. She really is a remarkable lady, and yet I think she'd be the first to say that she's not so remarkable. She is incredibly human. Mary Beth talks so much about the disconnect between her head and her heart as she grieves. In the times where her heart is angry, sad, confused, and overwhelmed...it is those moments that she tells herself that she must choose to believe what she knows to be true: that God loves her, that He is with her, that He can use even the most tragic events for His glory. It is truly amazing to see how God is working. Let me know if you decide to read it! In the meantime, know that you are both in my prayers. <3
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